Another Sleepless Night

it’s almost 4 am and my eyes are wide open. listening to buble’s tunes. lovely and melodious as ever. makes the world go round. being back at home is relaxing and feels very laid back. the town seems smaller now. there isn’t much to do. isn’t anywhere else to go. yet it is here where i grew up. the memories remain. each place i visit, the film rolls like a playback. like pictures in an album, they make me smile. such innocence.

many times my mind travel back to that house. the one in the corner, sometimes windy, sometimes hot in the noon. the living hall where i used to nap, the battlefield where we fought. that old tv screen still sitting there, reminding us that some things never change. it is us who changed. i hear from a distance the old chinese tunes on a sunny day. the neighbour’s dog barking and the carefree me. no one said a word about tomorrow. it is the present. now, that matters. i used to enjoy going outside picking up little fallen mangoes and pile them up in a sack. such simple joy. that tall shady tree. that childhood memory. the tree has been fallen now. yet, i still remember. nights where rain and wind never fail to visit. every mid autumn festival. glowing candles all lit up in between the grills of the gate. uncle would be so pissed. never did we care. of course, we were kids. drawing on sand. writing and scribbling. they made me happy. and they still do now.

i’ve always wanted to grow up. now i’m not so sure. being a kid isn’t such a bad idea after all. but then again, who are we to decide?

some people say that life’s a journey, not a destination.

i think life’s a decision.

loving and living is a decision we make.

everything else fall somewhere in between.

i wanna be home. with myself.

love. merry christmas and may we all cheer to a blessed year ahead.


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Miss Fiona

December 2009
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she can be contacted at

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